Inane Rambling

Truth is like the stars; it does not appear except from behind obscurity of the night. Truth is like all beautiful things in the world; it does not disclose its desirability except to those who first feel the influence of falsehood. Truth is a deep kindness that teaches us to be content in our everyday life and share with the people the same happiness.
..
Kahlil Gibran


I wonder what the world would be like if everyone communicated with the open and honest attitude of children. It makes me think of that movie with Jim Carey (?) where he cannot tell a lie. Certainly it makes for some awkward moments, some hilarious situations you'd probably rather avoid, but can you imagine everyone being totally frank with you? You'd always know where you stand with them, wouldn't you? No questions, no miscommunications, no doubts to plague you.

Instead, as we develop sensitivities and defenses, we tend to sidestep brutal honesty in deference to diplomacy and tact. We don't want to hurt one anothers' feelings, we fear we'll alienate those we need or want, we're afraid perhaps of receiving the same honesty in return and what that will mean to us as individuals, or total honesty upsets our own personal agendas.

What I'm talking about as childish communication is doing so without barriers; fearless communication. They say what comes to mind and they haven't learned to be afraid to speak their minds regardless of what immediate emotion or thought has control of them. They aren't caught up in fear of rejection for the little beggars are totally self-oriented. If they don't like something, you can bet you're going to learn about it, usually very audibly.

If you think I'm a bitch, tell me I'm a bitch. Sure, it may bother me but you've just opened an opportunity for real communication if I take the opening you've given me. I might ask you to explain why you think my actions qualify me as bitchy and then I might give you my take on situations which have led me to the current mood or action which dictates that I'm being what you say I am. We might get the chance to clear the air on many misconceptions or misunderstandings and then we might not speak to one another again for a few days. We might learn things about one another that we'd never have discovered otherwise because strong emotions will reveal much if you'll let them. Who knows? The point is that we communicated and we did so without barriers we'd normally erect for our protection or in the name of diplomacy.

How often have you left the presence of someone with less than perfect feelings about something or an uncertainty niggling at your mind or emotions? Why not just stop, force the truth and know where you stand? Why not push the issue which might be leaving you both with wrong impressions which will cause distance, lack of trust and respect, or a total dissolution of the relationship? What are we the most afraid of; their honesty or the effect our own will have?

Tell me where the hell I stand. It's preferable. If I don't like where I'm standing, I can always opt to stand elsewhere. I hate games. I hate manipulations. I hate having to cater to people when honesty would serve a worthier purpose.

Yes, I'm guilty of having done exactly what I say I hate but I try not to do so any more. Every relationship, regardless of the type, requires communication but what's the point if it's not open and honest? So, for those whose more delicate feelings I may tromp, I apologize in advance. I'm not afraid to communicate and I'm able to handle your criticism and your opinions. If you think I'm wrong, call me on it. I'm capable of being brutally honest with myself about myself if you'll dare to point things out. If not, then don't make me accountable for your tender feelings, please, and don't just label me without giving us both the opportunity of understanding one another better.